rock steady

first day of the wk. knee doesnt feel so gd, it hurts and it bothers me. wing cmd summons me into the office and asked me which term was i out of course. i'm listed as OOC in ST1, so the probability is that i may have to redo ST1 which i don't really mind as i failed my map reading. yup, i wasn't too bothered by it, i didn't really care anymore, everything was just crumbling down. i decided. God, u have your way in me. I don't want to do my way but Lord, i want Your will, whatever it may be, to be in my life. I decided to give up my relationship with her. It hurts but i have to do it. In the world, this will be a perfect ideal relationship, boy meets girl, boy falls in love with girl, boy takes care of girl and everyone lives happily ever after. but the world's standards are so different from God's standards. if we were to continue moving on as we were, it will lead to a disasterous ending. and no one wil be happy, only hurt. So it's over, at least for now, it's really over. I'm starting to not treat her like a potential girl-friend, but as a sister, a friend, for i desire to build up friendship with her, and not because i want anythign else. It sucks, but it's a decision that's got to be made. It's been only 3 days since we made the decision. And i do feel at peace with the decision, knowing it's the right thing. knowing that by losing, i'm gaining more than i ever had before. I badly want it to work. It's kinda awkward when everyone else assumes that the two of us together, and they tease you and stuff like that. well, three days ago, it'll be ok. but now it's just a pain in the neck for the two of us. well, we both deserved it, especially me. ha.So that's it for now. got to go back to work. got to go keep running. AHM's coming up, don't want to die of cramps halfway in the race.