Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Friendship
Writing online can be a double-edged sword. While hiding behind the privacy, and to some a sense of security, of the 22-inch LCD screen, it only requires a few ounces of energy on Google to unravel the blog that one keeps hidden from close friends, colleagues and family members.
Over the course of the last two months, I've the opportunity to interact with several people both physically and virtually, through regular meetings on weekends and over instant real-time messaging services.
As I spent time talking to them over certain issues which included, one of yours truly favourite's, relationship. I start to have my own doubts, not about my ability to have and maintain a relationship which is highly questionable, but rather the coming together of two parties.
Inferring from a person's comments regarding the current relationship, the previous relationships, the eventual state of the relationship between both parties after a decision was made to call it quits, I felt concerned for the other half. Though I'm not close to the other half nor am I to this person, after the horrid things I've personally committed while in an "unsactioned" relationship, I'm more inclined to think towards the benefit of the opposite gender.
People that I've sought after for advice regarding relationships have stressed on the importance of friendship in a romantic relationship. I believe that after the romance, hopefully not for eternity, has fizzled out, and the parties settled into a predictable routine, the friendship acts as the bedrock of the relationship, and the marriage vows, the anchoring aspect of their committment to each other and no one else.
It is thus troubling to my soul to hear one speak about a relationship in certain terms which may be normal to others. Perhaps, as much as I develop into a more pragmatic person in the romantic department of my life, I still maintain certain idealistic ideals and cling on to them desparately, while believing that others can settle for second best, I should not, however possible, pick off the scraps of the table when it comes to this.
My heart goes out to the person in question. While I do not wish to be the instrument that drives a wedge in between them, I can only hope that the relationship will have the legs to carry it to marriage. And with the union, a shift in the relationship between both parties.
It is unfair to judge the health of the relationship as I'm not involved in it at a first-person level. Nor have I been around the block long enough to know what had happened, has happened and possibly will happen in the future in this relationship. I can only wish that they truly find happiness in the decision they made that led to this relationship being formed.
I guess it'll be hard to know the person well when I'm pursuing. But I pray that if things happen, I'll be able to know whoever it is well enough over the course of time. This person shall become my soul-mate and my best friend that I'll ever have on this green earth, set up by God.
Even if things go pear-shaped, that we'll still be friends and communicate with each other.
Everyone knows how painful it is to lose someone who you hold close to your heart.
To whoever that's reading this, is the person the right one for you? In all honesty, I don't have the answer and I don't think anyone will have the answer for you. The answer, I guess, is one that only you can answer and it lies in your eventual choice and decision.
I can't remember who said to me, but find someone who loves you more than you love him.
I've only been around the block once, but when a girl falls in love with you, she doesn't give you half or a quarter of her heart, but she offers you her whole heart and devotion.
I know I screwed up in love, hurt a loved one in more ways than one, and by my own admission, usually unsuccessful in my pursuit of the fine young lady, but
I'll want to be a good guy cos there's just too many of the bad ones around.
Over the course of the last two months, I've the opportunity to interact with several people both physically and virtually, through regular meetings on weekends and over instant real-time messaging services.
As I spent time talking to them over certain issues which included, one of yours truly favourite's, relationship. I start to have my own doubts, not about my ability to have and maintain a relationship which is highly questionable, but rather the coming together of two parties.
Inferring from a person's comments regarding the current relationship, the previous relationships, the eventual state of the relationship between both parties after a decision was made to call it quits, I felt concerned for the other half. Though I'm not close to the other half nor am I to this person, after the horrid things I've personally committed while in an "unsactioned" relationship, I'm more inclined to think towards the benefit of the opposite gender.
People that I've sought after for advice regarding relationships have stressed on the importance of friendship in a romantic relationship. I believe that after the romance, hopefully not for eternity, has fizzled out, and the parties settled into a predictable routine, the friendship acts as the bedrock of the relationship, and the marriage vows, the anchoring aspect of their committment to each other and no one else.
It is thus troubling to my soul to hear one speak about a relationship in certain terms which may be normal to others. Perhaps, as much as I develop into a more pragmatic person in the romantic department of my life, I still maintain certain idealistic ideals and cling on to them desparately, while believing that others can settle for second best, I should not, however possible, pick off the scraps of the table when it comes to this.
My heart goes out to the person in question. While I do not wish to be the instrument that drives a wedge in between them, I can only hope that the relationship will have the legs to carry it to marriage. And with the union, a shift in the relationship between both parties.
It is unfair to judge the health of the relationship as I'm not involved in it at a first-person level. Nor have I been around the block long enough to know what had happened, has happened and possibly will happen in the future in this relationship. I can only wish that they truly find happiness in the decision they made that led to this relationship being formed.
I guess it'll be hard to know the person well when I'm pursuing. But I pray that if things happen, I'll be able to know whoever it is well enough over the course of time. This person shall become my soul-mate and my best friend that I'll ever have on this green earth, set up by God.
Even if things go pear-shaped, that we'll still be friends and communicate with each other.
Everyone knows how painful it is to lose someone who you hold close to your heart.
To whoever that's reading this, is the person the right one for you? In all honesty, I don't have the answer and I don't think anyone will have the answer for you. The answer, I guess, is one that only you can answer and it lies in your eventual choice and decision.
I can't remember who said to me, but find someone who loves you more than you love him.
I've only been around the block once, but when a girl falls in love with you, she doesn't give you half or a quarter of her heart, but she offers you her whole heart and devotion.
I know I screwed up in love, hurt a loved one in more ways than one, and by my own admission, usually unsuccessful in my pursuit of the fine young lady, but
I'll want to be a good guy cos there's just too many of the bad ones around.
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